Kids
Apr 16, 2009
When my doctor first pointed out my daughter’s hoo-ha on the big screen and declared, “You’re having a girl,” my first thought was: “Yes! Baby girl clothes!” But my second thought…?
“Oh crap. She had BETTER not post naughty pictures of herself on MySpace.”
I know, I know… not likely to happen. But only because MySpace [...]
Apr 10, 2009
In a fashion development sure to give podiatrists a future boost in business, a line of high-heeled booties for babies has been launched for the six-month-and-under set.
You know, just in case you were looking for something to accentuate your little one’s baby bustier.
The mini-stilettos are sold online with the tag line: “Heelarious – her first [...]
Apr 6, 2009
Mr. Candy and I braved the harsh sunny, 75-degree L.A. weather yesterday to watch my eight-year-old cousin play softball. Knowing her team was called the sweet-sounding “Rockin’ Raspberries” last year, I had visions of little girls in cotton candy-colored uniforms laughingly lobbing the softball to opposing team members, who would try to swing somewhere within [...]
Apr 2, 2009
Parties sure have changed since I had my 13th birthday party at a bowling alley with chicken tenders and pitchers of RC Cola…
A stellar Mother of the Week contender has been arrested for serving alcohol to young teens at a party in Missouri and, even better, offering a $10 prize to whomever could chug a [...]
Apr 1, 2009
My husband claims when the doctor told us last month that we’re having a girl, our daughter’s entire life flashed before his protective eyes: from kindergarten to her first date, from the prom to her wedding. I’m guessing that in this vision, however, he did not imagine our teenage daughter would choose a prom dress [...]
Apr 1, 2009
A Massachusetts youth soccer coach who dubbed his team of 6- and 7-year-old girls “Green Death,” urging them to eat “undercooked red meat” (ed. note: mmm-mmm, good) and win at all costs has quit after his preseason manifesto shocked parents and league officials.
Green Death? He should have been fired immediately. I mean, I think everyone [...]
Mar 27, 2009
As some of you know, Mr. Candy romantically wooed me with a Snuggie for Valentine’s Day this year. Because nothing says “you’ve never looked more beautiful, my pregnant wife” quite like a cotton sack with sleeves.
Thankfully, adults aren’t the only ones who can strut their stuff in this fashionable backwards bathrobe now. Introducing the “baby [...]
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