The Center on Education Policy found that girls generally have the same proficiency in math as boys at the elementary, middle and high school grade levels (although boys appear to have an edge at the advanced level).  Girls have traditionally trailed boys in that subject, but no longer.  Woo-hoo!  There was no discussion of the possible impetus for this advancement.

However, the traditional gender gap in reading remains, with girls outperforming boys at the three main grade levels.  Among 4th graders, girls performed better than boys at every achievement level in every state.  In many states, the learning gap exceeded 10 percent.  Yikes.

Which may explain why my husband is so bad at reading directions before installing things like our towel rack, which continues to sit on our floor.  Just not his forte.

Pretty sure just LOOKING at that school lunch on the right has clogged my arteries.

Obviously, despite the growing national focus on children’s health, this suggests that efforts to provide healthier choices on school lunch menus still have a long way to go.

Having better options is particularly important in middle school, as that’s when children start to become more independent, says Elizabeth Jackson, MD, MPH, assistant professor of internal medicine at the University of Michigan Health System in Ann Arbor.  The choices they make then will shape their eating and exercise habits as they get older, she says.

I almost always bought my lunch at school.  I would blame that for the extra fifty pounds I ended up gaining in college — but something tells me that had less to do with my chicken patty sandwiches in junior high, and more to do with the many kegs of beer I helped kick.

The study involved 1,076 middle school students who filled out questionnaires asking what they ate, how much physical activity they got, and the number of hours they watched TV, played video games, and spent on the computer each day.

Then they were divided into three groups, depending on whether they said they “always” or “almost always” ate school lunches, “always” or “almost always” brought their midday meal from home, or sometimes did one and sometimes the other.

The findings were presented at the annual meeting of the American College of Cardiology.  Some would say the attendees were disHEARTened by the results.  (See what I did there?)

Well, if that’s the case, he could have at least followed it with, “LOL!”

The girl’s mother, Patty Clement, said the Enka Middle School teacher Rex Roland has done this twice now on her daughter’s assignments and says it sends the wrong message.

“This is telling her ‘You’re a loser. You’re not going to go anywhere,’” she said.

The girl was removed from Roland’s class.  Roland apologized, saying this was his way of relating to students by using their language.  In which case, he probably also scrawls “DOUCHE!” on the papers of students who use words such as “plethora” excessively.

Some parents defended his, um, unconventional teaching style, but Clement wants him suspended.

The school district will only say that this is a personnel matter that’s being looked into.

Way to instill confidence in your students, Mr. Roland.  Any esteemed educator will tell you that you should only THINK TO YOURSELF that your students are losers — never actually call them out on it.  Jeesh.

Kendra Wilkinson declares her post-baby body was “such a culture shock.”  Meaning women carrying a few extra pounds live in a different culture…?  [Us Weekly]

Well, it should hearten Kendra to hear:  Breastfeeding helps moms stay slimmer later in life.  [MSN]

Baby apparel and items celebrating St. Patty’s Day.  Which should go well with Mom and Dad’s pints of Guinness.  [Tot Trends Weekly]

‘Parent universities’ help moms, dads deal with the modern teen.  Classes include:  Translating Your Teenager’s Grunt; Negotiation; Speaking Twilightese; Moping 101.  [Chicago Tribune]

Matt Damon says his daughters are “thriving” in New York (with accompanying photo providing your daily dose of “awwww”).  [Baby Scoop]

If anything will restore your faith in true love, this is it:  Lee Jin-gyuhas finally made an honest pile of cotton out of his beloved ‘dakimakura’ — a kind of large, huggable pillow from Japan — by marrying the pillow in a “special ceremony.”

Oh, that’s special, all right.

The 28-year-old wed the pillow (which has an image of Fate Testarossa, a character from an anime series, printed on its side) after dressing it in a wedding dress for the service in front of a local priest.  Their nuptials were eagerly chronicled by the local media — no doubt because they’re inspired by the amazing love story.

“He is completely obsessed with this pillow and takes it everywhere,” said one friend who, surprisingly, remained anonymous.

“They go out to the park or the funfair where it will go on all the rides with him. Then when he goes out to eat he takes it with him and it gets its own seat and its own meal,” the friend added.

The pillow marriage is not the first similarly-themed unusual marriage in recent times — it comes after another Japanese man married his virtual girlfriend Nene Anegasaki, a character who only exists in the Nintendo DS game Love Plus, last November.  Awwww.

No word on whether Lee and his dakimakur plan on expanding their family with a brood of throw pillows.

D’oh.

The scoop, according to Chicago Sun-Times:

The day after her son was born, Jennifer Spiegel was awakened about 4 a.m. in her Evanston Hospital room and told by a staffer, “Your baby wants you.”

A patient-care technician then wheeled a newborn in and handed him to Spiegel, who breast-fed him.

But it wasn’t her son, according to a lawsuit filed in Cook County Circuit Court.

A surprised nurse walked in while Spiegel was breast-feeding the boy and realized the mix-up, the Spiegels told the Chicago Sun-Times.

“The nurse saw Jennifer and looked very surprised. She told us … ‘I was just with your baby in the nursery,’ ” said Jennifer’s husband, Scott, who was in the room at the time.

“She said, ‘The baby you’re feeding isn’t yours,’ ” Jennifer Spiegel, 33, recalled. “It was just an awful, internal feeling.”

The Spiegels said they didn’t notice they had the wrong baby because he was swaddled up to his chin and wearing a cap — and it was the middle of the night.

“I couldn’t see his hair,” Jennifer Spiegel said.

The patient-care technician offered a tearful apology, which they accepted, Scott Spiegel said.

“But it’s not enough,” he added.

So, really, they didn’t accept it.  Perhaps even odder than unknowingly nursing a stranger’s baby:  they are filing this lawsuit TWO YEARS after the incident happened.  Hmmmm… been hit by the recession, huh, guys?

From what I’ve read, Evanston Hospital follows the same procedure that many other hospitals do, whereby they ask parents to verify their matching I.D. bracelet before handing over the baby.  Would not be surprised if the mom, being utterly exhausted, just shook her head “yes” without even looking.  I’m not saying the hospital wasn’t in the wrong – it obviously was – but to the tune of thirty grand…?  C’mon.  I mean, we’ve ALL stuck a breast in a stranger’s mouth at some point and survived just fine, right?  Um… right?  (Yeah, no, me neither! Ha, ha! Just kidding. *Ahem*)

And if you’ve ever looked at a pair of Payless ballet flats and thought to yourself, “You know what I could really use with these?  EYE SHADOW!”, well, you’re in luck:  Those busy bees at Payless have partnered with Maesa Group to create a collection of beauty and body care products.  The new beauty merchandise, to be sold under brands names “Zoe & Zac” and “Unforgettable Moments,” will be available for as low as $2.99 an item, the company said.

That’s not all…!  Oh no.   Payless is also tapping into the fitness craze with a new collection of women’s toning shoes under the Champion Fitness banner.   The line, which began testing in select locations in December, is rolling out now to stores and to the company’s Web site.  The three-style toning shoe collection will be in nearly all of Payless’ locations by this summer and will cost just $25 – $40 to work that booty off.

Cheap and lazy — that’s my kind of workout.

“If it’s a boy, are you going to circumcise him?” my friends wanted to know.  “Um, I assume so, why?” I asked cluelessly.

Of course, once it became relevant to me, I started paying more attention to the growing debate:  some parents flatly refuse to circumcise their sons, believing it is “barbaric”; some parents rush to circumcise their sons; and yet others are utterly conflicted over what they should do.

I still believe I would.  But if I had given birth to a boy, who knows what we would have done once confronted with the reality of the situation?

Further fueling the debate is the group Intact America, an organization formed to change how Americans think about neonatal male circumcision, which has asked Massachusetts lawmakers to outlaw infant male circumcision.

Supporters of the proposed ban describe the procedure as “unnecessary, painful and risky.”  Georganne Chapin, executive director of the group, said the procedure is also unethical because the infant cannot give his consent.

Naturally, religious groups oppose the bill because it has no religious exemption.

Although studies have linked circumcision to a reduction in the transmission of AIDS in Africa, backers of the bill say that’s not a good enough reason to block a ban.

How about the other health benefits, such as protection from urinary tract infections, smegma, oncogenic types of human papillomavirus, genital herpes, syphilis and chancroid, penile cancer, and possibly prostate cancer, phimosis, paraphimosis, thrush, and inflammatory skin conditions such as balanitis and balanoposthitis?   Or how it benefits men’s female sex partners by providing substantial protection from cervical cancer, genital herpes, bacterial vaginosis and possibly Chlamydia  (that can cause pelvic inflammatory disease, infertility, and ectopic pregnancy)?

To name a few.

So far, no Massachusetts lawmakers have signed on to support the measure.  Hmmmm.  I’m no strategy expert, but perhaps Intact America should have targeted a state that DOESN’T have one of the largest Jewish populations in the country.

“Being a chef,” Angerer explains, “you’re curious about anything in terms of flavor — you look out for something new and what you can do with it.”

In fact, Angerer says his wife (who’s also his business partner)’s milk reminds him of the cow’s milk that he’d pick up, as a child, from a farm in Austria:  “It was still warm and it would sour the next day.”  Angerer says that two gallons of the mother’s milk yielded almost two quarts of cheese.  “After two weeks aging, it was somewhat like a raw-milk cheese — it had all the flavors in there. It tastes just like really sweet cow’s milk. It wasn’t like, ‘Hey, this is such an amazing cheese.’  It’s just like, ‘Can you use human milk?  Yes, you absolutely can!’”  So it will do in a pinch, but perhaps you should hold off on serving it with crackers at your next office party.

Wondering how you can whip up a batch of booby cheese?  You’re in luck!  Angerer is so excited about the results that he has posted a recipe for “My Spouse’s Mommy Milk Cheese” on his blog, and is even inviting folks over for a taste:  “Our baby has plenty back-up mother’s milk in the freezer, so whoever wants to try it is welcome to try it as long as supply lasts (please consider cheese aging time).”

Mmmmm.  I’m sure it would taste delicious melted in a placenta panini!

(Actually, we drink milk from barnyard animals, so consuming milk expressed from humans isn’t so weird.  As far as the placenta-based cuisine goes… it sounds so scrumptious, that I think I’ll, um, leave all of it for YOU.  Because that’s the kind of selfless person I am.)

Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart are puffing on celebratory cigars right now!  Or, more likely, are sleeping uncomfortably in their hospital room.  [lilSugar]

A list of recent kid-related product safety recalls.  Proving that not all publicity is good publicity.  [Parenting]

Tips from a new book helping women come to terms with beauty and aging.  I would say Joan Rivers is a good role model for that.  [Forbes]

Sleep expert imparts advice about kids’ sleeping habits, such as napping and wanting to sleep in their parents’ bed.  Which is GREAT for the ol’ sex life.  [GMA]

Celebrating the arrival of Pam and Jim’s baby on The Office with a discussion about “favorite sitcom births.”  I’m partial to Phoebe having her brother’s babies, myself.  “Little high fives!  Ahhh!  Ahhh!  Ahhh!”  Although I did cry watching tonight’s “Office.”  I know, I know… I’m a SAP.  [EW]