Jul 13, 2011 | Filed Under: Television, Top 10 Lists | Tags: Ouch, Top 10
It’s a tot-eat-tot world in Hollywood, as twins Jaden and Ella Hiller — who play Lily on Modern Family — are finding out. The ABC comedy is spreading the word around the casting community that it is looking for an “Asian, 3-to 4-year-old” to play the daughter of Mitchell and Cameron. Although there is still a small chance the Hillers will stay on the show, writers want to keep their options open.
“We adore Jaden and Ella, but have started to think that they’d rather be at home playing than working as actors,” executive producer Steve Levitan tells Entertainment Weekly. “Maybe they don’t love to be on a set and have to listen to us do a scene 10 times. Maybe they would be happier being kids. We don’t want them to be unhappy. If we feel it’s not in their best interest to stay, we will replace them, and ask that people forgive us for doing so.”
Of course, producers never tell us what’s really going on behind the scenes. Which is why The Laughing Stork presents…
The Top 10 Reasons Modern Family is Really Recasting Lily:
10. Let’s just say the twins insist on more than just juice in their on-set sippy cups.
9. The twins’ suggestion that Sofia Vergara dress more demurely did not go over well with the mostly male production staff.
8. Jaden and Ella are too embarrassed to remain on a network that also airs Wipeout.
7. The twins are counting on Ryan Seacrest to give them their own hit reality show instead.
6. The toddlers rejected the producer’s “suggestion” that they shave off a few months with a shot of Botots (Botox for Tots!).
5. They’re afraid of “that really grumpy man” (Ed O’Neill).
4. According to the toddlers, the producers “do not have a proper appreciation of our deadpan take on the character of Lily; therefore, we must leave because of creative differences.”
3. The twins are tired of begging on-set Food Services to include Cheerios.
2. The girls would like more time to pursue “other opportunities,” like edgy independent film roles and potty training.
1. Three words: CELEBRITY BABY REHAB! (See also: #10)
Jan 31, 2011 | Filed Under: Celebrities, Pop Culture | Tags: Ava Jackman, Hugh Jackman, Ouch
Rule #1 of the Father-Daughter Snowball Fight: Always launch the frozen ammunition when the opponent is walking away, so you can get a running start before your opponent invariably exacts his/her revenge.
Dec 28, 2010 | Filed Under: Funny Animal and Pet Photos, Pet Humor | Tags: Ouch
“This tour guide could use a little more training,” Mittens thinks.
Aug 21, 2010 | Filed Under: In the News, Weird But True | Tags: Ouch
[Ed. note: No word on whether everything came out okay in the end.]
Jun 25, 2010 | Filed Under: Candy's Column | Tags: Miss Skye, Ouch
Only a matter of time ’til I have to ask Jeremy Piven if I may borrow one of his hair pieces.
Jun 15, 2010 | Filed Under: Storktionary | Tags: Ouch, Word of the Day
1. My ten-month-old daughter who prefers solid foods of the flesh variety*, sinking her six teeth into my neck, cheek and shoulder every chance she gets — and laughing when I yelp, “No! Eating mommy is not allowed!”
2. The reason I am shopping for turtlenecks in June.
[from Spanish Canibales, meaning pint-sized vampire]
*The author is most thankful this has not extended to nursing habits
May 26, 2010 | Filed Under: Featured, Food | Tags: Baby Shower Cakes, Ouch
When I say I like to nibble on chubby babies, I mean it FIGURATIVELY. Yikes.