Tag - Mom and Pop Culture Report

Let’s Chat About Celebrity Family Gossip, Shall We?

I kicked off my Monday with a 5:45 a.m. wake-up call from Drew, who somehow had poop smeared down his leg and up his back, yet very little on his actual BUTT — this was after waking up with him at 12 a.m. and 2 a.m., mind you — followed by a parking ticket outside daycare for being parked in a street cleaning zone one minute too long.  I am, like, not even exaggerating.

Yay for Mondays!

I would start drinking if only I didn’t have to pick up the kids this afternoon (the daycare frowns upon moms whose breath smells like appletinis…SO uptight), so I am going to drown my sorrows in another guilty pleasure instead:  celebrity gossip.  Let’s chat about the latest famous family news, shall we?

I opened my Us Weekly daily e-newsletter to receive some VERY important news: Vanessa Minnillo is 12 weeks pregnant and, according to Nick, craving burritos.  Knowing these guys, a pregnancy sponsorship by Taco Bell can’t be far behind.

Speaking of Us Weekly

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The Mom and Pop Culture Report: Jennifer Garner Has a Baby Boy; Jessica Simpson Still Has a Month of Misery

Your roundup of recent celebrity family news. Because where else are you going to find the most up-to-date status of Jennifer Aniston’s “baby bump”?  [OFFICIAL STATUS THIS WEEK:  “Could be.”]

BABY BUMP WATCH:  Jessica Simpson reportedly has one more month of pregnancy left
I remember fondly referring to this stage of pregnancy as “JUST STICK A F*CKING FORK IN ME.”

BIRTH ANNOUNCEMENT:  Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck welcome a baby boy
Although no name has been released yet, Violet and Seraphina have been overheard calling him “Our new dress-up doll.”

PREGNANCY ALERT:  Uma Thurman pregnant with third child
So Uma will be the mother of a newborn and a teenager at the same time.  Fun!

LEGAL STUFF:  Kelsey and Camille Grammer agree to joint custody
Meanwhile, Camille retains sole custody of her silicone-filled “girls.”

FIRST COMES BABY, THEN COMES MARRIAGE: Natalie Portman marries her baby daddy
Weird.  My wedding invite must have gotten lost in the mail.  *Ahem*

CELEBRITY PARENTHOOD:  Julia Roberts says her kids have no idea she’s famous
They also have no idea why she agreed to be in Mary Reilly.