Tag - Mom and Pop Culture Report

Let’s Chat About Celebrity Family Gossip, Shall We?

I kicked off my Monday with a 5:45 a.m. wake-up call from Drew, who somehow had poop smeared down his leg and up his back, yet very little on his actual BUTT — this was after waking up with him at 12 a.m. and 2 a.m., mind you — followed by a parking ticket outside daycare for being parked in a street cleaning zone one minute too long.  I am, like, not even exaggerating.

Yay for Mondays!

I would start drinking if only I didn’t have to pick up the kids this afternoon (the daycare frowns upon moms whose breath smells like appletinis…SO uptight), so I am going to drown my sorrows in another guilty pleasure instead:  celebrity gossip.  Let’s chat about the latest famous family news, shall we?

I opened my Us Weekly daily e-newsletter to receive some VERY important news: Vanessa Minnillo is 12 weeks pregnant and, according to Nick, craving burritos.  Knowing these guys, a pregnancy sponsorship by Taco Bell can’t be far behind.

Speaking of Us Weekly

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The Mom and Pop Culture Report: Jennifer Garner Has a Baby Boy; Jessica Simpson Still Has a Month of Misery

Your roundup of recent celebrity family news. Because where else are you going to find the most up-to-date status of Jennifer Aniston’s “baby bump”?  [OFFICIAL STATUS THIS WEEK:  "Could be."]

BABY BUMP WATCH:  Jessica Simpson reportedly has one more month of pregnancy left
I remember fondly referring to this stage of pregnancy as “JUST STICK A F*CKING FORK IN ME.”

BIRTH ANNOUNCEMENT:  Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck welcome a baby boy
Although no name has been released yet, Violet and Seraphina have been overheard calling him “Our new dress-up doll.”

PREGNANCY ALERT:  Uma Thurman pregnant with third child
So Uma will be the mother of a newborn and a teenager at the same time.  Fun!

LEGAL STUFF:  Kelsey and Camille Grammer agree to joint custody
Meanwhile, Camille retains sole custody of her silicone-filled “girls.”

FIRST COMES BABY, THEN COMES MARRIAGE: Natalie Portman marries her baby daddy
Weird.  My wedding invite must have gotten lost in the mail.  *Ahem*

CELEBRITY PARENTHOOD:  Julia Roberts says her kids have no idea she’s famous
They also have no idea why she agreed to be in Mary Reilly.

The Mom and Pop Culture Report: Kourtney Kardashian is Coo-Coo for Queso; Drew Barrymore is with Sonogram; Jessica Simpson is Still Pregnant

Your at-a-glance roundup of recent celebrity family news. Because where else are you going to find the status of Jennifer Aniston’s eight-year “baby bump”?  [OFFICIAL STATUS:  Still not a baby bump.]

BABY BUMP WATCH:  Jessica Simpson Heads Out for Shopping Trip with Mom
I don’t mean to start rumors, but based on this picture… I think Jessica Simpson could be pregnant?

SPEAKING OF PREGNANCY RUMORS:  Drew Barrymore Spotted Leaving Doctor’s Office with Sonogram
Good catch, TMZ.  But don’t be surprised if your birth announcement gets “lost in the mail.”

REALITY TV UPDATE:  Bethenny Frankel Reveals Recent Miscarriage After Eight Weeks of Pregnancy
Meanwhile, blog commenters post supportive comments like, “TOTAL PUBLICITY STUNT!”

CELEBRITY PATERNITY FUN:  Minnie Driver Reveals Son Henry’s Father After 3 Years
Despite Kevin Federline and Mel Gibson being odds-on favorites, the baby daddy is actually a TV writer.

IMPORTANT PREGNANCY CRAVING ALERT: Kourtney Kardashian “Was Hyperventilating” Over Queso Dip, Says Khloe
A fondness for cheese? Explains why she’s still with Scott Disick.

The “World Exclusive” on the Travoltas’ Baby Name and How Shiloh — Gasp! — Spends Her Spare Time

John Travolta, 56, and Kelly Preston, 48, announce the name of their soon-to-be-born son:  Benjamin.  And Benjamin has a name for them:  “Grandpa…?  Grandma…?”  [Star]

Katherine Heigl poses with daughter Naleigh on the cover of W magazine, proving that no matter how beautiful you may be, your baby’s ridiculously adorable chubby cheeks will still COMPLETELY upstage you.  [NY Daily News]

“Dude, you’d BETTER know what you’re doing with that,” Shiloh thinks before embarking on the zip-wire in Budapest.  (Of course, what child hasn’t gone zip-wiring in Hungary?  So cliché.)   [Daily Mail]

Kendra Wilkinson says she and her husband juggle the baby and bedroom by having “quickies.”  Also known as:  “The only kind of sex people with children have.” [People]

The Mom and Pop Culture Report: Gosselin Kids Rake in the Dough; Harrison and Calista Get Hitched

Your at-a-glance roundup of pop culture news. Because mamas need to know the status of Gwyneth Paltrow’s weight, too! [CURRENT STATUS:  "It sometimes goes up a little."  Fascinating!  Don't leave us hanging like that.  Tell us more!]

Gosselin kids earn more than Jon on Plus Eight.  Hopefully, that money is being put away… for their future therapy bills.  [PopEater]

Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart get married after eight years of dating.  Geesh!  What’s the rush, guys?  [TMZ]

Megan Fox is engaged to David Silver once again.  In response, their families said, “Nice try, guys, but we’re not getting you ANY MORE ENGAGEMENT GIFTS.”  [Us]

Chris Klein busted for DUI, blowing almost three times the legal limit.  Wow.  Police plan to book him when he wakes up next year.  [TMZ]

Porn star Devon James claims Tiger Woods is father of her 9-year-old child.  Warning:  Article contains dangerously bad “Tiger cub” pun.  [NY Daily News]

Elton John “a little surprised” by invite to perform at Rush Limbaugh’s wedding.  Because Rush seems like more of a Hip-Hop kind of guy.  [People]

Miley Cyrus on Perez Hilton posting pantyless pic:   “That’s like, some idiot being an idiot — that’s not me, you know what I’m saying?”  Um, like, no, not really.  [Billboard]

The Mom and Pop Culture Report: Khole Kardashian is Pregnant; Charlie Sheen is Jailed; Miley Cyrus is Half-Dressed

Your at-a-glance roundup of recent pop culture news. Because mamas need to know the status of  Lindsay Lohan’s wisdom teeth, too! [STATUS:  GONE!  SO EXCITING!]

Khloe Kardashian reportedly two months pregnant.   Oh goody!  Why, just the other day I was thinking, You know what this world needs?  MORE KARDASHIANS! [Radar]

After forty years of marriage, Al and Tipper Gore separate.  Tipper cites growing apart, irreconcilable boredom.  [Politico]

Miley Cyrus asks herself WWBD (What Would Britney Do?), wears just a satin bustier to perform for tween audience.  [E!]

Charlie Sheen will serve 30 days in jail in plea deal.  No word on whether he’s allowed conjugal visits from his blow-up dolls.  [People]

Glee‘s Jane Lynch weds girlfriend.  I wonder if she wore the traditional white tracksuit?  [Us Weekly]

Shrek stomps Sex and the City 2 at the box office.   Yeah, when you’re beaten by a cartoon ogre, it’s time to hang up your stilettos.  [PopEater]