As my fellow pop culture addicts surely are aware, the wedding of the CENTURY — well, okay, the wedding of the WEEK — is taking place soon. That’s right; Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are gettin’ hitched in Paris! (If the French didn’t have a bad impression of us before, they will now.) So I thought I would give you an exclusive SNEAK PEEK at what we can expect to see at Le Wedding du Kimye. (See, Mom and Dad? Those seven years of French really DID pay off, after all!)
#1 – A wedding dress that mirrors Kim’s usual, um, modest style.
#2 – A cake featuring Kanye and his true love. Awwww.
#3 – Wedding pictures and album, arranged by Kim’s mom.
#4 – Their closest friends in attendance.
#5 – Perhaps not the most eloquent wedding toast from Kendall.
#6 – Lots of beauty and elegance.
#7 – A no-show from North. Because Kim knows as soon as she allows her cute baby at the wedding, NOBODY WILL NOTICE HER. But, hopefully, they’ll let her come to the reception in time for the Electric Slide. It would be cruel to deprive her of that.
Apple announces September 20th release date for iPhone 5S and iPhone 5C, which come in various colors and with a fingerprint sensor
“Just what I wanted! A gold phone to match my grills!” –Madonna
Gwen Stefani reportedly pregnant with baby #3 at 43
In related news, sales of pediatric hair dye expected to rise in nine months
A dramatic rise in kids swallowing powerful (and potentially fatal) magnets
Well, that’s ONE way to prevent your parents from hanging your report card on the fridge
Woman pushes husband off cliff after one week of marriage
Ugh. A simple “I don’t” would have sufficed.
Mario Lopez and Courtney Mazza welcome baby boy named Dominic
Something tells me all the “EXCLUSIVE!” details will be shared on EXTRA!
Mr. Candy and I celebrated our 10-year wedding anniversary while we were back on the East Coast — an anniversary typically celebrated with aluminum or tin, but given the weather conditions, we celebrated it with the gift of excessively big hair (the gift that keeps on growing, er… giving) — and as we honored the occasion, I couldn’t help but reflect on how things have changed in the past decade.
A few slight differences…
Although it’s not on fire, so I’d say he got off easy.
An actual scene from Chez Candy and Mr. Candy* from the other day.
*Only in our house, there was more milk on the floor, less camel toe on my part (I hope).
Police say a woman was caught trying to sneak her common-law-husband out of a Mexican prison in a suitcase following a conjugal visit.
You can leave your socks on...
I bet they got caught because they balked at the $50 overweight bag fee.
And might I just say to the lucky wife: Kudos! That is one flexible man.
As offered helpfully by my hubby “in jest.”