Category - Candy’s Column


The Fallen Teetotaler

Eleven months ago, waaaaay back when Bush was still president and Kendra was still pretending to have sex with Hef, I got those two pink lines on the pregnancy test and saw a beautiful life flash before my eyes — the end of my beautiful...


Dirty Talk

CANDY: Hey, hon?  [WAITS, THEN:] HEY, HONEY! MR. CANDY: [WATCHING BABY IN THE NEXT ROOM] …Yeah?! CANDY: Does she still have that booger?


Reaching for the Stars

Skylar turned a big corner this weekend.  Instead of demanding to be held during all of her waking hours, she is now content to just sit and stare at her mobile as its lambs, stars and cloud-covered moon go ’round and ’round.