Once in a lifetime comes a parenting blog with photographs so touching, it makes your ovaries ache. This is not that blog. Mr. Candy and I agree that this picture captures 99% of parenting a preschooler: What’s included: One (1)...
Category - Candy’s Column
I recently came across an article titled “You might be an L.A. Mom If” — and, being an L.A. mom myself, I clicked on it out of curiosity and the hope I would get a few chuckles out of it. It turned out to be more insulting...
Re-posting this from September 28, 2010 in honor of Teacher Appreciation Week… I walked to the front of the classroom and handed my homework, an essay about the horrors of babysitting, to Mr. Shirley. The writing assignment had been due...
You know how it’s commonplace to compare disasters to the Hindenburg? Well, I wanted to personally alert you to the newest, hottest metaphor in town — because after my family’s first-ever professional family photo shoot last...
There comes a moment in most every mom’s life when she thinks, You know what we could use around here? MORE PUKE AND POOP! This moment is usually preceded by Benadryl and wine. I’m pretty sure that’s how we’ve ended...
Sung, of course, to the tune of “Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer”: Dora got run over by Mr. Candy. Dropped under his car by Miss Skye. We can say the watch just “got lost,” But as for Miss Skye, she don’t...
My reaction to 2012 is, I imagine, the same as Paris Hilton’s upon seeing her old pal Kim’s pregnancy news splashed across every media outlet: “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JUST MAKE IT GO AWAY!” You see, my year ended with...
Ah, the teenage years — full of raging hormones, bad attitudes, insecurities and zits big enough to be claimed as a tax deduction. Now that I’m a mom, I can’t help but cringe at the thought of my kids becoming teenagers...
I dreaded telling Miss Skye that Marcy had passed away. The concept of death is hard for me to wrap my head around, let alone a child who had spent most every day of her three years of life with the cat — with whom she was obsessed —...
We had just returned from a harrowing 30 hours at the hospital with Drew — an ordeal I will share with you when I have the strength later this week, but I will spoil the ending: he’s on the mend now, thank goodness — when I...
While I tend to my sick and miserable little boy who won’t stop clinging to me (no, not Mr. Candy…this time), I thought I would re-post this column that was originally published on December 6, 2009. Okay, SO… I hadn’t...
The time has finally arrived, folks: Skye is potty trained! For the most part! Giddy exclamation points all around! So, to reward our daughter for doing her business in the toilet, I offered to buy her — wait for it — MORE...
We’ve already established why my three-year-old would rock this election season as a presidential candidate; if you’re not totally convinced, however, here are some more reasons why you should consider voting for this...
A weird thing happens after you have babies. They grow into little people. This is the conundrum I’ve been grappling with lately. Regular readers have probably noticed that I haven’t been writing as much about my life, or...
According to indisputable, statistically significant research, wherein I quickly thought about some of my friends and readers, an increasing number of people are having two children aged two and under — or, as obstetrics professionals...