The Afternoon Dish: Kris Jenner’s Birthday “Gift” to Her Son; Hugh Grant’s Parental Pearl of Wisdom

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Because this is the only dish I’m capable of cooking up:  celebrity family gossip.  (Better that I poison your minds with fluff than your stomachs with undercooked chicken, as Mr. Candy can attest.)

To help son Rob celebrate his 25th birthday, Kris Jenner releases an old picture of herself, very pregnant and mostly naked. Which is usually at the top of any son’s gift wish list, really.

Not only is Josh Lucas — SURPRISE! — married, but he is also — SURPRISE! — expecting a baby with his new wife.  (Sorry, Mr. Candy, your man-crush is TAKEN!  I’ll try to refrain from watching Sweet Home Alabama over and over again, as I’m prone to do.  At least until your pain subsides.)

Halle Berry’s three-year-old daughter, Nahla, spotted licking an amusement ride safety bar.  I would say something snarky about it, if only I weren’t so busy extracting a discarded ten-day-old piece of gum from my daughter’s hands.

Jessica Simpson expresses thanks for “dream” baby shower this weekend.  Which she may have meant literally, because I know I spent the better part of my pregnancies in a “dream”-like state.

Today’s pearl of parental wisdom comes from Hugh Grant , who says this about not spoiling his 4-month-old daughter Tabitha: “There are few things in life I believe in 100 percent, but one is not giving your children money,” the actor explained. “I see nothing but f-ck-ups among my trust fund friends. It’s like 99 percent f-ck-ups. So I would not want to do that to my children, no.”

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. She also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats who enjoy blanketing every inch of the house in kitty fur. For more of Candy's nonsense, check out her personal Twitter, The Laughing Stork's Twitter and The Laughing Stork's Facebook page.

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4 Comments

  1. Newb

    Mar 20, 2012 at 7:56 am

    Mmmmmmmmmm… Josh Lucas……anyone who can make me scream to a character “NO! Don’t marry McDreamy!!” has to be hot. I’m so not a rom-com girl at all, but my copy of Sweet Home Alabama is wearing down rapidly.

    • Candy

      Mar 20, 2012 at 10:34 am

      anyone who can make me scream to a character “NO! Don’t marry McDreamy!!” has to be hot.

      THIS.

      Mr. Candy’s not the biggest fan of rom-coms either (surprise, surprise), but he was pleasantly surprised by SHA.

  2. Mrs. Harrison Ford

    Mar 20, 2012 at 11:43 am

    Hand in there, Mr. Candy, it’ll be ok.

  3. Mr. Candy

    Mar 20, 2012 at 7:50 pm

    With Josh out of the picture, I guess Candy and I might make it after all.

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