The Laughing Stork’s Guide to Baby-Talk for Non-Parents

Since having kids, I haven’t spent nearly as much time with my childless friends, I’m sad to say — most likely because we’re practically speaking different languages these days.  (That, and the fact that I need to make any plans ten years in advance now…and will probably still end up canceling at the last minute because somebody in the house is sick.)  This is why I’ve created this handy-dandy conversation guide for my friends who are not parents, in hopes of bridging the gap:

 

Because sharing is caring, as I tell my kids. (Except my wine. Never my wine.)
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Candy Kirby

Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).