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Shiloh Jolie-Pitt’s State of the Hair Addresss

Celebrities

Shiloh Jolie-Pitt’s State of the Hair Addresss

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Mr. President, Mr. Vice President, members of the World Wide Web, not-so-distinguished blog commenters, celebrity rags and fellow Americans:

Over the weekend, I cut my hair short again, sparking a debate of more than 200 comments on the popular celebrity news site, People.com — a response we haven’t seen since People announced the results of Kim Kardashian’s butt X-ray.  Sadly, I am not surprised.  In fact, I made this bold cosmetic move to demonstrate how people’s priorities are out of whack, caring more passionately about the length of a five-year-old’s hair than they do about child genocide in Syria and families who are still without homes in New Orleans.

Also, I wanted to prove Zahara wrong and show her I can use the scissors all by myself.  No matter what my mom and nanny say.  Ha, haaaa!  Told you, Z.

Seriously, people. IT’S JUST HAIR!  Get over it.

With apologies for getting the nanny in trouble (again),

Shiloh-John–Shax-Whatever the Heck I Want to Call Myself

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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