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Let’s Get This Winesday Started: Pinot Noir Shake

Mama Needs a Drink (Recipes)

Let’s Get This Winesday Started: Pinot Noir Shake

There is a burger bar in the neighborhood Mr. Candy and I enjoy going to, a place where we can feel like adults — A cocktail menu!  No Happy Meals! — but that still accommodates kids with space for strollers and a kick-ass toasted peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  With italics to emphasize the voracity with which I sneak bites of my daughter’s PB&Js from there.

Hey.  I gave the child LIFE.  I’d say that deserves a stolen morsel of sandwich.  Or two.  Or five.

The restaurant also offers a specialty Pinot Noir shake.  Now, I know what you’re thinking because I had the very same reaction:  Say wha –?!   Wine?  With ice cream?  That’s madness!  A little gross, even.  I MUST TRY IT!  Which is what I would say every time we went there, my mouth full of peanut butter and jelly, only to leave, shake-less, because I prefer to get my drink on after the kids go to bed.  Also:  a good time to dig into Skye’s goldfish crackers.  So, being the experienced food-and-drink thief that I am, I decided to steal their recipe for the Pinot Shake to try at home — then share it with you.

Yes!  I am a modern-day Robin Hood! Stealing from rich cocktail menus to give to buzz-poor moms.

THE PINOT NOIR SHAKE

This photo shoot interrupted by Laughing Stork CEO and wine shake lover, Marcy Cuddles

INGREDIENTS

About 1 cup vanilla ice cream or frozen yogurt (we used the latter because we are health-conscious alcoholics)

1/4- to 1/2-cup Pinot Noir (we used the latter because… well, you know why)

Cherries

Chocolate syrup

Whipped cream

1 packet of sugar/Splenda/what-have-you (optional)

INSTRUCTIONS

Make sure your seven-month-old is SOUND asleep before opening wine bottle; otherwise, the *POP* will be immediately followed by the sound of “WAAAAHHHH!” (True story.)  Soothe baby, if necessary, with appropriate lullabies such as “Let’s Get This Party Started.”  Mix ice cream and wine — with sugar for added sweetness, if that floats your boat — in blender on “milkshake” mode.  Pour wine-shake into glass, top off with whipped cream, chocolate syrup and, of course, a cherry.

THE VERDICT

Mr. Candy and I sat down to watch a DVR’d episode of Modern Family last Friday — don’t be jealous of our glamorous nightlife — and finished our shakes before the opening music even began. “Yeah, I’ll make more,” I offered, pausing on Sofia Vergara with her mouth open, much to Mr. Candy’s delight.

Wine and ice cream:  I never would have thought of putting them together, but they make for a surprisingly delicious combination.  Much like Sofia Vergara and Ed O’Neill.

Wine shakes and my two-year-old’s goldfish crackers, on the other hand… not so much.

More drink recipes…

Because sharing is caring, as I tell my kids. (Except my wine. Never my wine.)
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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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