Top 10 Reasons Why Babble Kicked Me Off Their List of “Best Mom Blogs”
Dec 14, 2011 | Filed Under: Top 10 Lists
The folks at Babble.com just released their annual list of “Best Mom Blogs” featuring 100 talented and classy women — exponentially more classy than last year’s list because, well, I have been dropped from the honorees. I’m not going to lie: it stings a little. Not just because I didn’t make the cut, but because they expanded the list from 50 to 100 featured bloggers and I still failed to make the cut.
I know, I know… ouch. Now would somebody tell the cats to stop looking at me with such grave disappointment? Nobody’s looked at me like that since I told my Grandma Kirby I’d been offered a job as a staff writer on the soap opera “The Bold and the Beautiful” and she replied, “So this means you’re never going to law school?”
My boobs aren’t the only thing that went downhill after giving birth to Drew in June. This site did, too, because I simply did not have the time to post with the same frequency I did pre-baby-who-never-sleeps-or-naps-or-lets-me-put-him-down-for-a-second. With both kids in daycare now, however, I’m starting to get my groove back. I also have time to surmise other reasons I was booted from the list…
Top 10 Possible Reasons Why Babble Kicked Me Off Their “Top Mom Blogs” List
10. This year’s bribe check bounced.
9. My mom refused to vote for me repeatedly this year.
8. They didn’t want their readers to be intimidated by my beauty:
7. With Disney acquiring Babble, I was disqualified for publicly announcing I had ogled a pantless Donald Duck.
6. Negative points for overuse of italics, em dashes, ellipses, “in fact” and easy Kardashian jokes.
5. In fact, you know who was probably on this year’s judging panel…? The Kardashian sisters and The English Patient screenwriter — and they totally decided to exact their revenge on me.
4. They were hoping for less talk of Mr. Candy’s cute butt, more pictures.
3. The husband-wife team behind Babble had me blackballed for poking fun at their Christmas card:
2. They are afraid they’ll lose advertisers if they continue to support a woman with the #1 name for hookers in the U.S.
1. They left the site, angry I had lured them with false promises. “Laughing stork? I didn’t even SEE a stork on there, let alone a jolly one, did you?”
In all seriousness, congratulations to all the wonderful moms on the list who will hopefully learn from my mistakes: ALWAYS respect Donald Duck, despite (or because of) his aversion to pants.
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Mette says:
Awww – you are my #1 Mom blog!!! But I would agree on #4!
December 14th, 2011 at 12:43 am -Mr.Candy says:
More of those pictures on Candy’s “other” website!
December 14th, 2011 at 1:35 pm -Candy says:
Awww – thanks, Mette!
December 14th, 2011 at 7:40 pm -Jovi says:
Well I have very discerning taste (proven by the fact that I think pajamas are appropriate clothing for outside the house) and you are my #1 blogger. Granted, I only read one blog, but that shouldn’t matter… But seriously, I love this site!
December 14th, 2011 at 6:15 am -Candy says:
(proven by the fact that I think pajamas are appropriate clothing for outside the house)
So happy to hear you would have approved of my ensemble for Mr. Candy’s office holiday party this year!
December 14th, 2011 at 7:40 pm -martini lover says:
you are one of the most original bloggers out there. just keep on keepin’ on!
December 14th, 2011 at 11:47 am -Deeva says:
LOL!! When life hands you lemons, write a funny post about it!!
December 14th, 2011 at 11:58 am -CJ says:
You’re still on MY top 100 list, if that means anything!
December 14th, 2011 at 1:24 pm -Candy says:
Being on your top 100 list means a lot to me. Even if it’s your list of top 100 weirdos.
December 14th, 2011 at 7:47 pm -stell says:
I’m looking forward to more Laughing Stork TV… As Martini Lover says: keep going. I know I’ll keep reading.
December 15th, 2011 at 12:05 pm -Candy says:
Oh, Stell, I brainstorm the direction of Laughing Stork TV every day. Once I determine what to do, and (perhaps even more importantly) what I can keep up with, it WILL return! Sooner rather than later, I hope.
In the meantime, if there is anything in particular that you guys think you would enjoy in video form, please let me know!
December 15th, 2011 at 2:04 pm -Jenn S. says:
Pffff, who trusts a site named Babble anyway?? Candy, you and your tales of mommyhood are awesome!
December 15th, 2011 at 12:07 pm -Candy says:
YOU’RE awesome.
December 17th, 2011 at 2:02 pm -Tracy says:
I think I found you from that list last year. But I am still reading and totally enjoy your site.
December 15th, 2011 at 1:09 pm -Candy says:
Yes, I’m grateful that last year’s list gave me the opportunity to connect with readers like you. Thanks for sticking around!
December 17th, 2011 at 2:04 pm -Jenny says:
I love your blog–we had our sons about 5 days apart–you’ve kept me laughing through prenancy and beyond! Thank you.
December 15th, 2011 at 4:05 pm -Candy says:
Five days apart…? Our sons could be cyber-playmates! Thank YOU for your kind words, Jenny.
December 17th, 2011 at 2:05 pm -