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Beyoncé Shows Off Bump in Itsy-Bitsy Ruffled White Bikini

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Beyoncé Shows Off Bump in Itsy-Bitsy Ruffled White Bikini

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A few years ago, in a time before kids when we could do crazy things like travel without carting 20 bags, two strollers, two car seats and two pack-n-plays with us, Mr. Candy and I went to Cabo for New Year’s Eve and who did we see roll up in their white yacht, but Beyoncé and Jay-Z .  Naturally, they stalked us, following us to a nightclub that night with an entourage in their white Escalade, both of them dressed in all white.  She, in a white dress, him in a white suit.

Glad to see imminent parenthood hasn’t diminished their love for matching white attire.

After celebrating her 30th birthday in Italy, Beyoncé and Jay-Z jetted to Hvar, Croatia yesterday, where the mama-to-be didn’t shy away from flaunting her bump in a ruffled bikini.  As for Jay-Z, it looks like he is already suffering from Daddy Brain and “forgot” to tie his shoes.  Poor guy.

By the way, readers chose “Baby Bey-Jay” as the name of their offspring.  So you’re welcome, B & J, we have already named your baby for you!  One less thing on your plate.  (My other two reader-submitted faves:  BeyonJay and Bob.)

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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