Baby showers are a time for women to “ooohhh” and “aaahhh” over tiny socks and breast pumps, and for men to be thankful they’re not women.
Also, apparently, a time to let the Baby Mama know exactly what’s in store for her:
Never before did I think I would have to censor a baby shower cake, but there’s a first for everything, I suppose — including the first time I’ve looked at a dessert and actually LOST my appetite (truly, a Sign of the Apocalypse).
For those of you who forgot your I.D. in order to see this X-rated goodie in all its uncensored glory, YES, the carpet matches the curtains. I know you were wondering. Sicko!