The Top 10 Differences Between Your First and Second Pregnancies

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Know why this mom is smiling? Because she’s allowing herself to have a cup of COFFEE this time ’round.

10.  First Pregnancy:  You devour every single weekly pregnancy milestone update from BabyCenter.com and know exactly what kind of fruit/vegetable your baby currently resembles.

Second Pregnancy:  “How far along am I?  Um, let me see…maybe somewhere in the first trimester?  Wait, no, third.  I think.”

9.  First Pregnancy:  You diligently avoid all caffeine, alcohol, sushi and other supposed pregnancy no-nos.

Second Pregnancy:  “Make it a DOUBLE ESPRESSO.  And bring it up to the bathroom where I’m going to be snorting aspirin in a steaming hot bath.  Thanks!”

8.  First Pregnancy:  “Yay!  I’m starting to show!”

Second Pregnancy:  “Oh, God.  I’m starting to show.  AND I’M ONLY ONE WEEK PREGNANT.”

7.  First Pregnancy: You play French folk music and Learn Japanese CDs before going to sleep in hopes of giving birth to a multilingual genius with an IQ of 150.

Second Pregnancy:  Screw the folk music.  Nothing wrong with having a child of mediocre intelligence!  Because, let’s face it, you want to go to sleep as soon as you can when you already have a child with another on the way.

6.  First Pregnancy:  You feel the baby kick around 20 weeks.

Second Pregnancy:  You feel the baby kick around 12 weeks.  And why is that?  “Your muscles aren’t as strong the second time around, so you feel it more,” the OB says “helpfully.”  *SIGH*  A simple “you’re more in-tune with your body” would have sufficed, doc.

5.  First Pregnancy:  YOU:  Guess what?  I’m pregnant!  FRIENDS & FAMILY:  Yaaaaayyyy!  This is the best news EVER!

Second Pregnancy:  YOU:  Guess what?  I’m pregnant!  FRIENDS & FAMILY:  Oh.  Neat.

4.  First Pregnancy:  You buy a ton of maternity clothes to show off that beautiful, blossoming bump.

Second Pregnancy:  It’s all about sweatpants.

3.  First Pregnancy:  You have outdone yourself with the nursery, which is beautiful enough to be displayed in the pages of House Beautiful.

Second Pregnancy:  You’re not even sure where you’re going to put the kid.  Put a blanket in a dresser drawer, perhaps?

2.  First Pregnancy:  You rub cocoa butter on your stomach every day to avoid stretch marks.

Second Pregnancy:  You quickly throw on your sweats to avoid looking at the stretch marks caused by your first pregnancy.

1.  First Pregnancy:  You and your baby are celebrated at a fun baby shower.

Second Pregnancy:  You are lucky if you have the time to take a hot shower.

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15 Comments

  1. Missy

    Jan 12, 2011 at 4:48 pm

    My experience with #5 was the response “Was it planned?” :)

    You crack me up…all of this is SO true!!!!

    • Candy

      Jan 12, 2011 at 4:54 pm

      Oh yes, I’ve gotten that too, Missy!

      • Mrs. Harrison Ford

        Jan 12, 2011 at 6:31 pm

        Give them my phone number and I’ll tell them to f@ck off for you. It’s one of my favorite things to do!

        • Barroness

          Jan 27, 2013 at 8:09 pm

          With my third my parents reply to the news was “Oh No”

  2. Cowgirl in the Sand

    Jan 12, 2011 at 4:54 pm

    This also holds true with newborn milestones.

    Baby #2′s 6-month check-up: “Is she sitting up on her own yet?” (Prop baby up. Watch baby slump over.) “Hm. Nope.”

    • candice

      Jul 17, 2011 at 10:56 pm

      haha this made me laugh!

  3. Mette

    Jan 13, 2011 at 12:30 am

    #11: First pregnancy: You take a picture of your belly every week to follow the developement

    Second pregnancy: Week 25 – ohhh maybe it’s time to take a picture.

    • Kelly

      Dec 10, 2012 at 1:02 pm

      wow, you took pictures? I’m 8.5mos pregnant and feel the pictures are overboard as well. same ole same ole

  4. Deeva

    Jan 13, 2011 at 12:59 pm

    LMAO! This is all so true as are all the comments. We also have thousands of pictures of our firstborn and not nearly as many of our second child.

  5. Kraken Corgi

    Feb 18, 2011 at 2:53 pm

    I was super good all through all 4 of my pregnancies. Expect after the 1st I didn’t care about stretch marks anymore. The damage was already done.

  6. jaya

    Nov 1, 2011 at 12:09 pm

    i was praying god so much for my first kid but now i want to postpone the next sweety

  7. Paulette

    Jul 28, 2012 at 5:05 am

    This is SO hilarious because it’s SO true!

  8. Vieanne

    Jul 29, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    it’s very entertaining to read but sure is informative. :)

  9. Ana

    Aug 7, 2012 at 8:57 pm

    First Pregnancy: “I won’t be like my mother, I’ll get my body back!”

    Second Pregnancy: “I do not have to care about my body when there is another body inside it.”

    First Pregnancy: Strictly breastfed.

    Second Pregnancy: Breast milk in bottle after pushing husband out of bed to feed the baby.

  10. LizC

    Oct 15, 2012 at 1:05 pm

    Thanks a lot! This made me feel better and laugh. I had been feeling gulity and thinking I was already being a terrible mother to my second unborn son because I hasnt been doing all these thing like I did with my first. :)

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