Candy's Column
Old Geezer Moments
“I wish I wrote a blog for old geezers after my experience today,” my mom just laughed on the phone. And, after hearing her experience and realizing that I easily could have encountered the very same “Old Geezer Moment” (*GULP*), I knew I had to share her tragic tale with you.
AFTER SEARCHING TARGET’S MUSIC SECTION, WITH NO LUCK:
CANDY’S MOM: I’m looking for Billy Joel. Or did he just fall off the face of the earth…?
20-YEAR-OLD TARGET SALESWOMAN: Just a sec. Let me check. (SEARCHES DATABASE, THEN:) What did you say the name of the CD is again? Falling Off the Face of the Earth?
CANDY’S MOM: No. Billy Joel. His greatest hits collection.
AFTER SEARCHING THE DATABASE AGAIN:
TARGET SALESWOMAN: Here, follow me.
AS SHE LEADS MY MOM TO THE COUNTRY MUSIC SECTION:
CANDY’S MOM: I don’t think this is right. He doesn’t sing country.
TARGET SALESWOMAN: (UTTERLY CONFUSED) What does he sing?
CANDY’S MOM: Um, more like pop? Rock?
AFTER SEARCHING THE DATABASE YET AGAIN:
TARGET SALESWOMAN: Oh! Okay. Yeah. Looks like we have his Essentials CD back in the storage room. We can get it for you.
CANDY’S MOM: “Essentials…?”
TARGET SALESWOMAN: That’s the new word for “greatest hits.”
CANDY’S MOM: (UTTERLY CONFUSED) Oh.
LATER, WHILE SHARING HER TALE WITH ME:
CANDY’S MOM: They didn’t even have his CD out front! He’s been relegated to storage.
ME: Yup. Billy Joel has been replaced by Justin Bieber CDs.
CANDY’S MOM: Thanks. You just turned my laughter into tears of sadness.