Candy's Column
Woman Dies from Embarrassment in Giant Baby Bottle Hit-and-Run
My apologies for being MIA the past couple of days. I went to a conference in Vegas and, sin of all sins, FORGOT MY LAPTOP. Still mad at me for slacking, you say? Well, perhaps your anger will turn to sympathy when I tell you I was almost run over by this golf cart topped with a massive baby bottle. It was going at least five miles an hour.
Not how I’d envisioned my obituary would read. Death by a bottle of Jose Cuervo, maybe. Certainly back in my college days. But not by a killer Latex baby bottle.
That would just be undignified.
