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Donald Duck runs afowl, charged with groping woman

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Donald Duck runs afowl, charged with groping woman

Ducking responsibility for his actions

A woman claims that a Disney employee dressed as Donald Duck grabbed her breast and molested her after she sought an autograph at Epcot Center in Florida.

Also, it must be noted that Donald was not wearing pants.

After the alleged groping, Donald Duck made gestures — apparently with his snowy white hands —“indicating he had done something wrong,” according to a lawsuit filed last month by the 27-year-old woman who was visiting Epcot with her children and fiancé in May 2008 when the incident reportedly occurred.

That’s right — she was so traumatized by Donald’s grab-and-run that it took her two years to file the lawsuit.  The alleged victim is suing Disney for negligence, battery, and infliction of emotional distress, and is seeking in excess of $50,000 in damages.  According to the complaint, she has suffered “severe physical injury, emotional anguish and distress including, but not limited to post-traumatic stress disorder” as a result of the run-in with Donald Duck.  She also contends that the incident was “one of a long line of continuing, long standing, similar prior incidents” involving the groping of patrons by costumed Disney employees

Meanwhile, thousands of us parents continue to put our kids in the arms of these strangers in furry costumes.  Sure, Donald may be a creepy pant-less breast molester in half of a sailor’s uniform, but think of how cute Donald and Junior’s picture will look in the family reunion slide show…!  It’s all about priorities, people, priorities.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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