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Overly Tanned Ralph Lauren Fries Brain in Sun, Fires Size-4 Model for Being “Too Fat

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Overly Tanned Ralph Lauren Fries Brain in Sun, Fires Size-4 Model for Being “Too Fat

As you may remember from an earlier post, Ralph Lauren was under fire for the above-left ad, in which model Filippa Hamilton was airbrushed to resemble a Praying Mantis — for which Ralph Lauren has since apologized, blaming it on “poor imaging.”

Well, their image about to get a whole lot more “poor,” with the 23-year-old Filippa coming forward to reveal that, after eight years of working for them, Ralph Lauren has actually fired the 5’10”, 120-lb. model for BEING TOO FAT.

Are they kidding me? Screw Ralph and that stupid Polo horse he rode in on!

Filippa was fired in April, but decided to go public now because she was appalled to see the altered image that made her look like skin and bones.  She said she looked so “dangerously emaciated,” she was compelled to protest.

“Every young woman is going to look at [the photo] and think that it is normal to look like that — it’s not,” Filippa told “Today Show” host Ann Curry.

Unless, of course, you want to use your hip bones to slice deli meats!  Then it’s all good. Karl Lagerfeld approves.

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Candy Kirby is the founder of The Laughing Stork and a professional fun-maker who will never stop chasing her lifelong dream: to find the Pomeranian or porn star after whom her parents must have named her. A humor columnist for Disney, Nickelodeon, Scary Mommy, Reductress and Redbook, she also used to be a staff writer for the soap opera, The Bold and the Beautiful, where she penned many scripts featuring prolonged heated stares and countless “Who’s the Daddy?” story lines. Candy lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two young kids and three rescue Persian cats, the latter of whom are the real brains behind this operation (so send all complaints to them).

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