Things Husbands and Toddlers Have in Common

Jun 1, 2012 | Filed Under: Satire, Toddlers | Tags:

Not that I’m talking about my husband, of course.  Just some husbands.  In general.  Yeah, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.


Guess the Product They’re Advertising to Moms

May 31, 2012 | Filed Under: Advertising, Games

Here’s the scoop:  I’ve collected some print ads targeted toward us moms and women, cropped the logo and/or name of the product, and thrown them up there to see if you can guess what it is, exactly, they’re trying to hawk.  I’ve even made it multiple choice.  (Because I’m nice like that.  Sometimes.)

Correct answers at the bottom of the post.  Game on!

1. 

This baby is being used to sell:

a. Paint

b. Diapers

c. Pacifiers

d. Shoes

e. Baby tattoo laser removal services

2. 

These two trouble-makers are selling us ________________.

a.  Paint

b.  Batteries

c.  Dog food

d.  Crayons

e.  Paint removal shampoo for dogs

Continue Reading »


Oh Boy: Honey Boo Boo Scores Toddlers & Tiaras Spin-Off

May 31, 2012 | Filed Under: Television | Tags:

If a dolla’ makes pageant queen Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson holla’, then we’re about to find out what a bunch of TLC cash makes her do…

Yes, this August, the 6-year-old Toddlers & Tiaras star will appear in her own spinoff, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo.  Consisting of six half-hour episodes, the new series will give viewers “an inside look into Alana’s world,” the network says in a statement.

Because that’s just what these pageant moms need:  more cash incentive, fame and encouragement.

Honey Boo Boo “proves that she is more than just a Go-Go Juice-drinking beauty queen,” the statement continues. “When she’s not chasing after crowns, Alana’s with her family in rural Georgia doing what her family does best: four-wheeling through mud pits and picking up road kill for the family cookout.”

And if we’re lucky, we’ll get to see some more of her mom’s killer dance moves:

Honey Boo Boo?  More like oh, Honey, No No.


Awkward Clip of the Day: Kathie Lee Asks Martin Short How His Deceased Wife is Doing

May 31, 2012 | Filed Under: Television | Tags: ,

Oh, Kathie Lee.

I catch Kathie Lee on TV every once in a while when getting the kids ready for daycare.  And, without fail, I watch and think:  WOW.  Just how much wine does that woman drink on-set, anyway?  She stumbles over reading simple lists.  She squawks.  She haughtily says there something that “worries” her about bloggers writing about their kids on the Internet when she regularly pimps out pictures and stories of her own children, Cody and Cassidy, on national TV AND on the Internet.

And that’s just in the first 15 minutes of the show.

Then there are truly awful, OMIGOD-I-CAN’T-BELIEVE-SHE-JUST-DID-THAT gaffes, like when she asked Martin Short yesterday how he and his wife, Nancie, keep the flame alive, and continued to press the subject, when Martin’s wife actually passed away from ovarian cancer two years ago.

OMIGOD, I CAN’T BELIEVE SHE JUST DID THAT.

Martin not only graciously rolled with the questions, not missing a beat, but he also defended Kathie Lee later, telling E! News that “it’s live television and people make mistakes.”  I think I love him. For her part, Kathie Lee apologized the best way she knows how — via Twitter — writing:

“I send my sincerest apologies to @MartinShort and his family. He handled situation w/enormous grace and kindness and I’m so grateful.”

Too bad @MartinShort isn’t his Twitter account.  But it’s the five-second effort that counts.

Stay tuned for next week when Kathie Lee asks Prince William what his mom thought of the big wedding!


Potty Training: 10 Signs It May Not Be Going Well

May 31, 2012 | Filed Under: Toddlers, Top 10 Lists | Tags: , , ,

Being in the midst of off-and-on potty training, ourselves, I thought I would share some wisdom I’ve gleaned along the way — mainly, 10 signs that potty training may not be going well.

1.  Toddler has broad definition of “potty.”

2.  Toddler unwisely insists, “I DO IT MYSELF!”

Continue Reading »


These Second Grade Teachers Are Setting Us Up, Man

May 30, 2012 | Filed Under: Pics from Around the Web, The Work of Kids | Tags:

The smile, the flushed face, the rays of sunshine surrounding her and the hearts to communicate Mom’s love of alcohol — yeah, I’d say the kid has perfectly captured the essence of a wine buzz.

Source





Celebrity Family Photo Gallery

mariah-moroccan

Mariah Carey and one-year-old son Moroccan hang out in a boat previously owned by JFK in Capri, Italy. You know, just everyday toddler life.

hilary-duff-gym

Hilary Duff reluctantly waves to the paparazzi after sweating off some baby weight at a gym in Studio City. Just what you want after a workout: cameras in your face! Fun.

miranda-kerr-flynn-may-2012

Miranda Kerr and 16-month-old Flynn arrive in Sydney, where Flynn shows us it IS possible to successfully pull off horizontal stripes.

pink-willow-may-2012

Pink and nearly one-year-old Willow grab a bite at Geoffreys in Malibu, which has gorgeous views of the ocean. Because that's how Willow rolls.

reese-witherspoon-pregnant-premiere

Reese Witherspoon shows off her pregnancy glow -- among other pregnancy "assets" -- at the Cannes premiere of "Mud"

siennamiller-pregnant-may

Pregnant Sienna Miller dresses in -- surprise! -- boho-style maternity wear while strolling through London's Primrose Hill

sarahjessicaparkertwins

Sarah Jessica Parker and 2-year-old twin daughters Tabitha and Loretta stroll in New York City. Looks like the girls have their lovies and SJP has her two lovies. Awwww.

beckhams-may-2012

David and Victoria Beckham -- along with sons Cruz, Romeo and Brooklyn -- attended the 27th Anniversary Sports Spectacular benefiting Cedars-Sinai Medical Genetics Institute, while Baby Harper has a kegger with friends at home

millajovovich-ever

Milla Jovovich and 4-year-old daughter Ever leave LAX looking like they just stepped out of a catalogue. When *I* get off a plane...? I usually look like I just spent three nights sleeping under a bridge.

islafisher-elula

Isla Fisher and 20-month-old daughter Elula enjoy a ride at an amusement park outside Cannes, where Papa Sacha is promoting "The Dictator" -- sure to be family-friendly entertainment!

jenniferconnelly-agnes-cannes

Jennifer Connelly and 11-month-old daughter Agnes check out the scene in Cannes, where Agnes is no doubt also hitting the party circuit

Hank-Baskett

Hank Baskett and 2-year-old son Hank Jr. leave a doctor's office in L.A. What a luscious mane of hair Hank Jr. has! No word on whether he plans on sharing some of it with Dad.

hilaryduff-luca-twitter

Hilary Duff Tweets a picture of herself with 7-week-old son Luca Cruz, who's all, "Wassup?"

alysonhannigan-satyana-hubby-park

Expectant mama Alyson Hannigan and hubby Alexis Denisof goof around with 3-year-old Satyana at the park. Perhaps if Alyson did that, it would speed up labor! Or just be terribly uncomfortable. Either/or.

charlizetheron-jackson-plane

Charlize Theron and 6-month-old son Jackson hop on a private jet in Paris, France. Charlize's shoes reportedly were so high, she didn't even need a ladder to get on the plane. True story.

Tori-Spelling-Pregnant-Orange-Bikini

Five(ish)-months-pregnant Tori Spelling relaxes by the pool, looking pretty darn good in an orange bikini. Note her very natural, not-at-all-posed stance for the paparazzi.

Sienna-Miller-pregnant

Pregnant Sienna Miller and baby-daddy Tom Sturridge take a babymoon in Portofino, Italy in their finest matching hipster headwear

bethennyfrankel-bryn-park

Bethenny Frankel and nearly-two-year-old Bryn leave a playground playdate in NYC. No word on whether Bryn is launching her *own* line of SkinnyToddler prdocuts.

kourtneykardashian-pregnant-mason

Seven(ish)-months-pregnant Kourtney Kardashian carries two-year-old Mason on her baby bump (a.k.a. Toddler Shelf) in Old Town Calabasas

DrewBarrymore-Pregnant-Dress

A not-yet-confirmed pregnant Drew Barrymore hits the gardens of the Huntington Library for a photo shoot and to provide fodder for tabloids' official "BUMP WATCH!"

katie-suri-april2012

Katie Holmes and 6-year-old Suri hit the ground running at Chelsea Piers, where they boarded their private helicopter. (You know, like ALL moms and kids do.)

VictoriaBeckham-Harper-HongKong

Victoria Beckham and 10-month-old daughter, Harper, arrive at the airport in Hong Kong where Harper asked her mom, "Why are you so underdressed?"

kourtneykardashian-mason-nyc

Pregnant Kourtney Kardashian walks with son Mason -- along with several personal umbrella holders (don't ALL moms?) --in New York City

HEIDIKLUM-DAUGHTERS

Heidi Klum walks with daughters Leni and Lou in L.A. (Try saying THAT five times fast.)

alysonhannigan-pregnant-april2012

Alyson Hannigan and her family spent an afternoon strolling the Abbot Kinney neighborhood in Venice. And I don't mean to start rumors, but -- I think Alyson might be pregnant?

jennymccarthy-evan

Jenny McCarthy and 9-year-old son Evan stroll the Sherman Oaks Mall, where a male "friend" walked their, um, dog.

bethennyfrankel-bryn-cookie

Bethenny Frankel, hubby Jason and daughter Bryn eat in the West Village, where Bryn noshed on a cookie the size of an Olsen Twin. Yum.

Alessandra-pregnant-bikini2

Seven-months-pregnant model Alessandra Ambrosio hits the beach in a tiny bikini. When *I* was that pregnant, the only thing I hit was the vending machine to see if I could coerce more Cheetos to come out.

alysonhannigan-satyana-pregnant

Alyson Hannigan and 3-year-old daughter Satyana arrive at LAX. I think Alyson's expression is seconded by most heavily pregnant women everywhere.

christinaapplegatesadie

Christina Applegate, mom to 1-year-old Sadie, recently confided she still wears her maternity jeans because they're "so comfortable." Not to mention the perfect attire for post-Thanksgiving dinner.

selmablair-arthur-april2012

Selma Blair totes 8-month-old Arthur around West Hollywood for errands, Easter parties and the embarrassment of getting smooches from mom in public. (Get used to it, kid!)

ReeseWitherspoon-Pregnant-Easter

Four(ish)-months-pregnant Reese Witherspoon leaves Easter Sunday services in Santa Monica

kourtneykardashian-bikini-pregnant2

Six-months pregnant Kourtney Kardashian dons a bikini in the Dominican Republic, where she's vacationing with the whole family (meaning: taping a show for E!).

Jada-Jaden-Willow

Jada, Willow and Jaden hit the orange carpet at the Kids' Choice Awards, where Jaden looks like he could, um, use some fiber in his diet.

natalie-portmann-aleph-9-months

Natalie Portman and 9-month-old Aleph head to a market in Orange County. Given Aleph's awesomely chunky thighs, looks like he's got a good appetite!

charlizetheron-baby-carseat

Charlize Theron goes to the post office with 4-month-old son, Jackson, who has requested more time in hair and makeup before making his REAL world debut

rachelzoe-skyler-newsroom

Rachel Zoe and 1-year-old son Skyler grab a bite at Newsroom Cafe, where Skyler was all, "Mommmm...! Were the color-coordinated outfits *really* necessary?"

alysonhannigan-premiere-pregnant

Alyson Hannigan cradles her +1 at the American Reunion premiere. (Let's hope she never sends her kids to band camp.)

jessicaalba-haven-doctor

Jessica Alba and 7-month-old daughter Haven leave the doctor's office in Santa Monica, where Haven has that dazed post-vaccine look. (I know it well.)

miranda-kerr-flynn-march-2012

Miranda Kerr and 14-month-old Flynn head back to their apartment in NYC, where they probably sat in front of a mirror and said, "Man, we're beautiful."

jengarner-violet-doctor-baby

Jennifer Garner Watches as Big Sister Violet, 6, Carries Baby Samuel to the Doctor (I Totally Need to Get Myself a Cute Assistant Like That!)

Richie-Sambora-Ava-March-2012

Richie Sambora and 14-year-old daughter Ava head to lunch in Calabasas. Although Ava is already a teenager (!), she still wears shorts from the toddler department. (*Sigh* I am not looking forward to the teenage years, that's for sure.)

pink-willow-march-2012

Girls' day out: Pink and 9-month-old Willow take a stroll in Santa Monica

tiffanithiessen-harper

Mommy-and-me fashionistas: Tiffani Thiessen and daughter Harper, 21 months, cruise the launch of the Diane von Furstenberg + Gap Kids and Baby Gap collection in L.A.

helenabomhamcarter-son

Stars -- Just like us! Only with wackier clothes! Helena Bonham Carter picks up 8-year-old son Billy Ray early from school because he was feeling (and looking) under the weather. Poor guy.

AlysonHannigan-Satyana-March-2012

Alyson Hannigan and almost 3-year-daughter Satyana shop for baby goodies in Santa Monica, with Satyana meaning business on her scooter

Michelle-Williams-Mathilda-Feb-2012

Michelle Williams and daughter Matilda leave a play gym in Studio City, where Michelle got HER workout by hoisting the six-year-old

Bethanny-Frankel-Bryn-Feb-2012

Bethenny Frankel and 18-month-old daughter Bryn hang out in Miami, where Bryn is likely enjoying sippy cups of virgin Skinny Girl margaritas

SJP-james-twin

Sarah Jessica Parker takes a walk in NYC with son James, daughter Marion and a paparazzo. Awwww.

SiennaMiller-bump

Oh yes! It's another OBBWA (Official Baby Bump Watch Alert): Sienna Miller showed off her baby bump while shooting "A Case of You" in New York City

gwenstefani-kids

Gwen Stefani hangs out with her sons at a Santa Monica park, where Kingston showed a fondness for subtle headwear

nicolerichie-sparrow

Nicole Richie and 2-year-old son Sparrow are, um, FLYING high on their way home from preschool. (Yes, I went there. At least I didn't TWEET it.)

sandrabullock-louis-feb2012

Sandra Bullock and two-year-old Louis share a smile -- and a love for stylish accessories -- in Los Angeles

SarahMichelleGellar-charlotte

Sarah Michelle Gellar and two-year-old Charlotte go shopping in Los Angeles. Nice to see a toddler with an appreciation for faux fur. Every time I try to put in on *my* two-year-old, she cries, "No wear doggie!"

blueivycarter

Introducing Blue Ivy Carter! She's all, "Hope you're ready for people to stop making a fuss over you, Mom, 'cause it's all about ME now!"

mirandakerr-flynn-feb2012

Miranda Kerr carries two important packages: one from UPS; and the other a 13-month-old chubby-cheeked cutie named Flynn

kourtneykardashian-bikini-pregnant

Pregnant Kourtney Kardashian sports a bikini on her Mexican vacation with Scott and Mason. Can't blame her for wearing a suit affording easy access for the many trips to the bathroom during pregnancy.

VictoriaBeckham-Harper-Plaid

Victoria Beckham and 6-month-old Harper wear coordinating plaid ensembles at LAX. Must be nice to be able to share clothes!

NicoleKidman-daughters

Nicole Kidman takes daughters Sunday, 3, and Faith, 13 months, to Romp Play Club in Hollywood. Not to be confused with Romp Gentlemen's Club in Manchester.

hilaryduff-pregnantfebruary

Seven-months-pregnant Hilary Duff at the Montage Beverly Hills Hotel before her baby shower on Super Bowl Sunday. Obviously, the baby is not much of a football fan.

heidi-klum-leni-lou

Heidi Klum may be wearing some kick-ass boots, but daughters Leni and Lou are the cutest accessory of all. (Awwww.)

jessicaalba-haven

Jessica Alba, hubby Cash and 5-month-old daughter Haven enjoy an afternoon at the park. Should they decide to have a picnic, I assume chubby baby thighs are on the menu.

jenagrner-seraphina-pregnant

Seraphina helps mom Jennifer Garner satisfy her late-state-pregnancy cravings with a trip to the grocery store in Santa Monica

SJP-twin-january2012

School & The City: Sarah Jessica Parker picks up two-year-old twins Loretta and Tabitha from daycare in New York City

Sandra-Bullock-Louis-Jan-2012

Sandra Bullock picks up two-year-old Louis Bardo from preschool in L.A., wearing a big smile and really sweet boots

jessica-simpson-pregnant-mastros

Jessica Simpson indulges her late-pregnancy cravings at Mastro's Steakhouse in Beverly Hills. Baby needs a Porterhouse!

January-Jones-Xander

January Jones, who has said she is just MAD about her little man (I know, I know...*GONG*), four-month-old son Xander, runs errands with him in L.A.

HavenBeckham-Jan2011

Victoria Beckham and 5-month-old daughter Harper sport matching pouts outside London's Savoy hotel

orlandobloom-flynn-hike

Orlando Bloom and 1-year-old son Flynn go on a hike in L.A.'s Runyon Canyon. Orlando appears to be getting an extra-good workout, lugging around those chubby cheeks!

SeanPreston-Jayden-HairRaising

Britney Spears' sons Sean Preston, 6, and Jayden James, 5, have a hair-raising good time.

Jen-Ben-doctor

A very pregnant Jennifer Garner and hubby Ben Affleck share a laugh on the way to the doctor's office.

Alessandra-pregnant-bikini

Pregnant Victoria's Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio and 3-year-old daughter Anja hang out in Brazil with a pal who bravely struts his stuff in short-shorts and white sneakers.

Angelina-Pax-Rifle

Angelina Jolie and 8-year-old Pax emerge from a Hollywood party store with toy rifle -- always a fun party favor!

rachelzoe-skyler

Rachel Zoe hit the shops in St. Bart's while 9-month-old son Skyler snacked on her necklace. Yum!

mariah-nick-twins

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon rang in the New Year with 8-month-old twins Moroccan and Monroe in Aspen -- all in coordinating white ensembles, of course.

SuriCruise-NewYork

Upon stepping into the chilly NYC air, Suri begins to re-think her earlier "I DON'T WANT TO WEAR MY COAT!" stance.

Pink-Willow-Sage

Pink and Willow pick up a must-have for new moms: caffeine.

Kendra-Hank-XmasTree

Kendra Wilkinson, Big Hank and Little Hank go shopping for a Christmas tree.

jessica-alba-haven-4-months

Jessica Alba's four-month-old daughter Haven has a much cheerier attitude about the holiday crowds than I do.

JenGarnerSeraphina-SantaMonica

Jennifer Garner demonstrates that baby bumps can also be used for toddler resting spots.

HilaryDuff-pregnant

A pregnant Hilary Duff takes baby boy out shopping. (Can never train 'em too young, I say.)

Beckhams-London

The Family Beckham touches down in London for the holidays. A shame they're not a more attractive clan. *Ahem*

See More Celebrity Family Photos>> »

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